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Language Log

Wednesday, Jun. 25, 2008 - 9:04 p.m.

A friend of mine is getting married this August. We had asked her when we saw her in December to let us know as soon as they had a date, because we would be planning a family vacation at about the same time. Emailed her twice in March, no reply. Just yesterday, got the invitation-- sure enough, it's right during the now already-mostly-planned vacation. Looks like her email addy changed, so maybe she never got my messages?

1. She came to my shower and my wedding, and was one of my bridesmaids (bought the dress).

2. A good friend! And I like her fella, too. Really very happy for her.

3. It's a very costy proposition, involving leaving the vacation early. It's only a week, and I'm lobbying to come in a day late already, so that doesn't leave much. Linguafranca pops in to have lunch with the family before disappearing again.

4. But I'm not in her bridal party, nor invited to any dinners or whatnot. Wedding and reception. Would I even be able to visit with her for more than 2 minutes? Should that matter?

5. Not sure what it is I'm enumerating, here. I thought it would clarify things, but it does not.

6. This is what it comes down to: I like to skip out on things that are inconvenent to me even when they are meaningful to others; I can be a jerk and feel bad, but not bad enough to prevent my doing it again. But if I go and have a less than entirely gratifying experience, then I get (privately) irked that I went out of my way, and for what. I'm kind of a jerk either way. Well, in some situations, I do the thing and then am glad I did the thing. But those are really a minority of the time. Usually I'm some variety of ass.

7. I had a good point to put here, but have forgotten what it was.

8. Oh, yeah. I think that if it had been scheduled the week before, when I have my monthly show at the farmer's market, I would say definitely no, can't attend. Well, it will after all be my main income for August. But still, for a few hundred bucks? And what does that say about the importance I give to the family vacation, if I'm willing to jettison that, but not willing to jettison my day's pay (and who knows how much it will be-- a pittance, maybe).

9. I could visit my mom while I'm down there-- she's been agitating for that lately.

10. That reminds me, my brother got back from rehab last night. I was gonna call, but it's too late now.

11. Still have not made up my mind about the wedding.

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