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Tuesday, Jan. 30, 2018 - 8:19 a.m.

I finished one piece for the TST show. It took over 3 hours. The organizer tells me she can’t put a starting bid on it of more than 20-30. I’m still feeling kinda mad about that, but J convinced me Inshould do it anyway. Maybe jewelry ruined me— people don’t really think twice about spending on jewelry.

I have been trying hard to keep thoughts of money out of it and just explore the medium for its own sake, but $20? Dude, that’s harsh. What do I want for it? I dunno, $60? Maybe I’m deluding myself.

I already have that sinking feeling I get when I realize I am going to be disappointed and hurt by things not going my way. I think I probably won’t go to the show because I...am just not up to feeling rejected right now. My options are go, feel bad, flee trying not to cry, or stay, maybe it goes ok and I say hi to the person I know and uncomfortable small talk with other people I know from online, then I flee and don’t sleep well because brain will do auto replay for the next 24 hrs minimum. Neither of those sounds delightful. Forget it.

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