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Saturday, Feb. 10, 2018 - 1:08 p.m.

I’ve decided I’m ready to start working on the jewelry again. It’s only been 5 months. Sheesh. It wasn’t the failure of the greed piece to sell that did it, I don’t think, but I have been at it long enough not to feel excited about cutting out more little printed flowers or cats or whatever right away.

Of course, now I have all this giant paper. It’s ok. I’ll make stuff with it.

I just don’t have a next project in mind yet. Then I think about what exactly my goals are? What does success feel like to me?

1. Making good art that people like. Meaningful, and beautiful. Work that I am proud of and means something to me.
2. But clearly that isn’t enough. I like it when people buy stuff. They don’t need to buy all the stuff, but I would like people to buy some of the stuff.

I always sort of imagine having a solo show somewhere, but that would also be a total nightmare for me. I probably need to work through my desire for that sort of success, because I don’t really have the credentials or access or the knowledge to make it happen.

3. I would like to be able to go somewhere for a summer just to make art, and then have an audience to receive it that cares about that element of things. Locality and specificity of the project. Not just churning out the same stuff in a production line, even if that stuff is popular (which would be ok for a little while, ha ha).

I feel like I’ve described these things over and over here throughout the years. But I still feel confused and unfocused and unable to progress.

Mainly I would like to be able to to stay focused long enough to accomplish something.

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