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Tuesday, Oct. 16, 2018 - 3:27 p.m.

Saw our friendly neighbor at park day and was reminded of my limitations wrt forming friendships. She tried, reached out and tried to involve me and make me feel welcome repeatedly, over a long period of time. I like her and her family a lot, and generally enjoy my conversations with her. But she has backed away and I know it’s because I havent reciprocated in the right ways. The whole homeschool group is like that. Welcoming, always available, inclusive. But I just can’t do more than that.

Supposed to have some time to myself today but am too exhausted from park day. I want to work on lace or calligraphy but no energy. Also sad feels hit me out of nowhere just now and once again I think I should look into it being related to my birth control. But that would involve making an appointment.

Too hard, guess I’ll die.

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