Saturday, Jan. 25, 2020 - 11:01 p.m.

I got so much done today. Worked on finishing the jewelry blanks till 10:30, watched kids, did a couple cyanotypes that turned out pretty good, did resin 2 times, prepped a garden bed and planted broccoli and carrots with the kids. Had ambitions about making a new compost pile soon.

On top of all that it was family dinner night and I also managed to show my mother my jewelry and explain cyanotype to her again and ate at the table and attempted to converse. I was doing so well, too, until she managed to stumble upon a couple of buttons of mine to push (“I wonder why you even went to college in the first place” and “do you ever do anything with your anthropology degree”*), and suddenly I was out of spoons and had to retreat. Then U started bugging me in the bedroom and of course ramped it up when I asked him to leave me alone, and next thing you know that chasm had opened under me again. Small meltdown as far as they go, but even a small one is exhausting and demoralizing. I wasn’t able to go out and say goodbye to mom and she sounded pretty salty when she left. Poor her. It is all about her, after all.

Eventually I fell asleep and I feel a little better now but not good and capable like earlier. I hope I feel better tomorrow.

�