Tuesday, Jun. 09, 2020 - 2:36 p.m.

It’s 2:36pm, I woke and started working on my print for the day and am on my 4th or 5th even though I got one I’m happy with.

I feel guilty, I shouldn’t be doing just this nonstop. Then I think how nice it would be to just do this without guilt or anything tugging me away.

Then I worry that this absorption is just my bad coping mechanism of the day.

Looking at photos lately, from years back, made me think about how fucking depressed I was during most of those times when the kids were younger. Or burnt out if not depressed. I think that’s passed but some things have never recovered.

Or maybe I should accept that my various obsessions are not bad coping mechanisms but my natural state. All the evidence points to that. But I do have guilt.

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