Wednesday, Apr. 18, 2018 - 7:55 a.m.

Now U has started smearing poop on the wall. He knows all about microbes and how in theory the ones in poop can make you very sick. “I washed my hands”, he reassures me.

Going to make some paste or fingerpaint for him that he can smear instead, and put those things where he can use them. Paste all over the wall isn’t great, but it’s a huge improvement over poop, amiright? He says he likes the way it feels.

I don’t know if they’ll decide he’s autistic, but he is a really good poster boy for why functioning labels are garbage. Asking the important questions about the universe? Check. Doing algebra at age 5? Check. Smearing poop on the wall? Erm, check.

Things I need to clarify for the psychologists: our parenting approach is based on an assumption of lagging skills, collaborative problem solving, and reasonable accommodations. Children do well when they can. If it sounds like I’m describing not enforcing limits, it’s because some situations call for more compassion/recognition that something is very hard for him for some reason at the moment, and we seek to model flexibility.

The objection to ABA is that it won’t address these lagging emotional skills, but teach surface-level compliance only.

I mentioned one or two times people said things that suggested I was unusual in my childhood, but I’m not basing my self-diagnosis on the one time someone said I was slow. I was bullied/picked on from the beginning to the end. Not intensely or systematically, but reliably.

Got the plane ticket to go to FL! Let’s see how much focused frittering away of my time, sitting around staring at the horizon, and pursuit of my own choice of activities without regard for others I can cram into 2.5 days.

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