Thursday, May. 23, 2019 - 8:20 p.m.

How Mom Irritated Me Today, bonus evening edition

So we have this juice U picked out last week at the grocery store. Turns out no one likes it. Mom liked it, so I offered it to her. U, being U, objected. (He has a pathological inability to share, or give away anything, even if it is broken or useless and the other person wants or needs it). E took his side because brother. I was annoyed at them; Mom got PISSED. Told them (run selfrighteousindignation.exe) she was never bringing any more pies or cookies or anything for them. Then tells ME (right in front of them) “Your kids need to learn how to GIVE a little and to SHARE.” I said, “Thanks mom, I had no idea about the moral failings of my children, thanks for pointing that out.”
“I have a few other things I can add to that list too!”
“Make sure to do it right in front of them when you do.”

Because, you know, it’s important for children to know exactly how you think they fail. There’s no other way to teach, right? But try to make them feel shitty and if that fails, make them feel shittier. It’s the only way!

Anyway, so then U comes up to me and says (calmly), “Grandma comes over every day whenever Daddy is away. She can drink it when she’s here!”

I told mom, listen. He said you can drink it when you come over. THIS IS HIM COMPROMISING. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS LOOKS LIKE.

She didn’t fucking get it. She didn’t see it. Change has to look exactly as she wants it to look or it isn’t good enough.

She left, angry. I’m not good enough, my kids aren’t good enough. The end.

�