Monday, Sept. 12, 2022 - 8:22 p.m.

Slogging through this jewelry order. I was in a sort of flow putting the resin on, had the distinct moment of clarity that soon I will need to re-order resin and pay for another year of the online marketplace and reorder more supplies and do I want to keep doing this? It’s only been like 3 year, barely started, but I’m over it.

In my mind I know exactly what I should do. In practice… I don’t feel like it. And why should I? Yes, it’s good money when it’s going well. But filling the orders is a slog. It isn’t supposed to be a slog. I can’t pretend it’s keeping me from doing other things I want to do, but somehow it feels like it is.

I don’t know.

I got stuck today and managed to break out of my demand avoidance catatonia by allowing myself to do a quick origami folding project from Pinterest. It was enough to get me unstuck, indulge my insistence on doing something interesting before the boring thing. But after that was all those thoughts about quitting. Quitting is fine, I just want to quit for the right reasons and not regret it after a couple months.

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