Saturday, Sept. 04, 2010 - 8:04 a.m.

Oh, look, it's been a week already. *sigh*

Spigotbottom has also begun to pull herself into a standing position. I now spend a vast amount of time a) cleaning the floors and b) wondering where the heck I'm going to put everything in our house that's currently located at 3 feet or below.

The sleeping hasn't gotten any better.

Other than that...oh wait. There isn't an 'other than that'. That is all there is.

Well, I do have that show in Memphis. Which I think I'm going to flake out on. I've been trying to get up some enthusiasm for it (since I really could use the money), but I think about an 8 hour drive there with Spigotbottom packed into the car so I can't even really see her and hence probably crying the whole way because she likes to be able to see me; and then arriving tired and having one of these nights where I get up every two hours, and then getting down to the festival to set up at 6:30. And then doing a whole day on 4 hours sleep and tearing down at the end of it. And then, a day later, another drive like the one we had on the way there. I'm not sure how much that would be worth to me, but I don't even have the inventory for it to come close. Plus in the meantime, I'm worrying about the whole thing; so add to that another 2 weeks of worrying. It all sounds like fun, doesn't it?

And I have shops here that could really use the inventory I do have. So I'm 95% decided-- the only thing that will make me go through with it is dislike of inconveniencing the organizers, and dislike of having to explain to everyone why I've changed my mind. "It turns out that I'm not capable of doing what I have to do to get things done. Next question?" IF I could just say, "I decided I didn't want to." that would be fine, but there would be conversation, conversation, conversation...and I don't really feel like conversing on the topic. Or defending my decision.

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