Friday, Sept. 03, 2021 - 1:23 p.m.

I wish I could do something about my mental states. I don’t know what’s what. Day before yesterday I was what I’d call at a more active stage and then yesterday I was on a very even keel and today I am disorganized and having trouble planning and doing things and I am very anxious and I don’t know why. Plus I need a nap.

Autistic? Perimenopausal? Cyclothymic? Adhd? In need of therapy or meds or… a nap.

I do wish it were normalized for people to talk about their mental states. And to accept it and people be not judgey but relate kindly where there is relating to be had.

I don’t like describing it and then feeling bad about it like I’m making myself out to be special or excused. But some days I don’t even know what I do all day. Several things but with large gaps where I rest or try to figure out what to do next. I don’t want anyone else organizing my time but also I damn sure can’t do it myself.

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