Wednesday, Jul. 26, 2023 - 12:16 p.m.

1. IG presents me with an artist using cyanotype on clothing, florals, she has a nice website and self-describes as an herbalist. I almost go mopey “oh someone is already doing it” but stop myself because I will not be doing what she is. Not at all.

2. Reflections on creative making and capitalism, again. The discussion of the commercially successful photographers at the dinner the other night. And a comment in passing during a conversation with J’s mom about how I can’t do as much for my mother as she’d like because I have not only my parenting responsibilities but also my jewelry business. “My own life” is what I would have said. But only the money earning part ranked a mention. I know it was only a comment in passing but we’re doing discourse analysis here. Anyway, yeah, how does value even get assigned if not through capitalism? I keep saying it but only because I can’t wrap my head around it. There may be meaning, it may be good work, but value that others can see? Value that counts socially? Nah.

And then of course we can’t survive under capitalism anyway, even when playing by those rules.

Just more bitching about it, I guess, but sometimes the problem is so clear to me.

3. In the end I only gained like 3 pounds and that was measuring this morning when the day after travel I’m usually somewhat bloated or whatever. I went for a walk this morning and now the soles of my feet hurt again and WHY?? I thought we had this all sorted out.

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