Wednesday, Oct. 04, 2023 - 7:50 p.m.

My new Hexennacht perfume arrived today. This time I love them all, including the free sample. Bisou, Mephistopheles, and Season of the Witch. Sometimes I get things that end up being very similar in character to ones I already have, but this time, no. They’re different from each other and different from what I already have.

Re-entered creative hypomania again today, as foreshadowed in my earlier entry. Doing things I already know I won’t be happy with. I did make a paper mache using a folded transparency as armature. I was able to remove it but did it too soon and it shrank and warped a little. I could probably just leave the transparency in there if I wanted to. I don’t know. The vision was of the paper mache casts of folded objects fused and rising up out of panels. Top coat collage of cyanotype or lettering. I don’t know if I’ll mess with the idea more or not. I would like to be instantly good at everything. Most of all I would like my attention to be sustained.

I can do little groupings of wall pieces and if I did I’d hate them and think they look cheap and crappy. Even though I also love them. Someone else would do them and put them on IG and I’d love them and hate myself. They’d be better than mine.

I need to keep folding the transparency material. Making shadows. I also love the idea of using those as wall pieces or mobiles but they’d feel cheap, wouldn’t they? So many problems. Again, someone else could make it look brilliant.

I can do anything I want, though. No one can stop me.

Anything but sell myself.

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